Crunchy Peas

a day at the office

5am awakening

candle burning

clock ticking

sun rising

breaths deepening

heartbeat monitoring

uterus contracting

cervix opening

hands holding

arms enveloping

words encouraging

(Doppler, gel, and pre-dawn candlelight.)

tub filling

water relaxing

warmth helping

body pushing

downward moving

passage opening

head crowning

shoulders coming

birth

baby crying

mama relieving

papa awing

finger counting

toe counting

eyes adoring

cord pulsating

family bonding

bodies warming

voices cooing

(Nearly 30 years of practice and approx 1,000+ babies! Pictures to prove it. Amazing.)

placenta leaving

breasts feeding

scale weighing

bottom diapering

blanket wrapping

word spreading

people congratulating

grandmas hugging

love growing

life beginning

home

(I'm always starving when I get home!?! Geez. It's not like I was the one doing the hardest work!)

 

And now let's go watch this:

Watch Call the Midwife - Preview on PBS. See more from Call the Midwife.

The smoke is back. I made a quick dash to the library to stock up on some reading.  I'm also glued to the TV watching this. Besides being on-call this weekend I think it's going to be nice and quiet. Hoping the same is true for you. 

well that's better

This is what I woke up to this morning:

See that? No smoke. Well only a little. I layed awake listening to the wind last night hoping that it was going to blow the smoke away. Oh how I've missed that view coming down the hill in the morning.

Ian and I celebrated with a run outside-- to the park, of course. It was nice to actually cover some ground vs jogging around the wheel on the treadmill.

Surprisingly it seems that Autumn showed up sometime over the last few weeks. The brilliant leaves have been hidden under the smoke. 

I'm feeling good. Besides getting a lovely dose of sun and fresh air, I've been doing a little cleanse. I think it's important for me to sort of reboot from time to time. My eating habits had become a little sloppy over the last month and I needed a "get-back-on-track-quick!" plan. We leave for Hawaii in a few short weeks. How's that for motivation?

Okay, I'm going back outside! Love to you all.

smoke refugees

We escaped the fires and fled west for the weekend.

To say that we were exctied to be outside, without masks, enjoying the fresh air, is an understatement.

We rode on the tractor,

caught some frogs,

played the guitar,

went to the park,

walked through the forest,

sat by the bay,

saw some friends,

drove out to my brother's little farm,

sniffed the sweet peas,

fed the goats,

cuddled the doggies,

we couldn't get enough of the doggies,

rode the horse,

brushed the ponies,

walked ran through the prairie,

(some of us walked),

added a little extreme sport,

ate at one of our old favorites,

and....*inhale*... took in a lot of fresh air.

It has never been so hard to come home. I felt like crying when we drove into our smoke-filled valley last night. I'm so glad that we were able to get away for a few days. I really, really needed it.

cooped up

 The fires are still raging. I will never take clean air for granted again. It's pretty horrible out there right now. We're so thankful for the firefighters who are working day and night and braving these dangerous conditions. As for us? We're doing the best we can to not complain and make the best of it. 

Who can complain about a little extra snuggle time?

Or root beer floats?

The kids are cooking?!

And so are the grownups...(ie: Me) Shrimp Cobb Salad. Yum.

I did see a little blue sky- briefly. Those aren't clouds. It's Smoke.

I also caught the sun just as it went down.

Up above it really is so pretty. Poor little smoky valley below.

See the mountains barely peeking through the horizon?

I didn't edit any of these.

Straight out of the camera.

At bedtime Ian and I reminded each other of something important. No matter how smoky (or how bad our singing voices are)...

Download You are my sunshine

(he was asking for you to "clap" at the end)

 

sending them off

(awake, happy, fed, teeth brushed, hair combed, beds made, lunches packed, homework finished, ON TIME and headed out the door this morning)

I haven't spoken much about my decision to send the kids to public school. It has taken me some time to sort through it all in my mind. Last year was difficult. I made it through just barely. When I stop and think about all the things that I was trying to do- and do well- it makes a lot of sense why I nearly had a nervous break down (I'm not kidding).  Just being a mom to 4 kids is a full time job in itself. Add to that teaching 3 different grades, managing a very busy toddler, keeping up with the housework, teaching childbirth classes, attending births... I'm having anxiety just thinking about all of it. Simply put: I was spread too thin. 

Now that the kids are back at school I'm adjusting to my new role. I'm finding that I love having the time to just focus on nurturing them. It's so great to be able to sit with them and ask, "How was your day today? What have you been thinking about lately? Tell me about the book you are reading? What was the funniest thing that happened to you this week? What do you think I would like about your new friends? How are you feeling about your progress in math?"

I'm rediscovering my role as their mom. I've missed it because I was too busy being their teacher.

There are a lot of people who are able to successfully homeschool with families that are much larger than mine. I am in awe of what they are able to do- amazing. I still totally believe in the paradigm of educating kids at home. I just think I had to get to this place where I was honest enough to say... I can't do it. I need some order. I need some quiet. I need some time with my son who's toddlerhood feels fleeting. I need to be able to workout 5+ times/wk. I need all of those things. Carl was patient with me while I took the summer to uncover this stuff. I'm thankful that he's been supportive and encouraged me not to look at it as some kind of failure on my part.

The kids are adjusting well. We are blessed with wonderful teachers this year! And even though our mornings can be a little crazy *sigh* I know I made the right decision. I have peace.

 

What's for dinner?

Sunday is usually the day that I plan meals for the week. Life is just better when I have a game plan for dinners- there are too many other things to think about! Here's a few yummy dinners that we had last week... 

Shrimp enchiladas. (I loved these! My family thought they were spicy)

Chicken Marsala (comfort food!)

Lime Pepper Chicken Stir-Fry (light and fresh)

Country Club Chicken (bacon!)

Got any good ones for me?

Friday (again)...

However, this is the "stay inside because it's too smokey outside" version)

(outside my front window)

(hate sending the kids out in it)

(breakfast)

(I love my friend)

(not flip-flops or sandals. it's been a while)

(building)

(meanest mom ever)

(I know it's not the beach ...but most of the same rules still apply.)

Happy Weekend!

Waiting

Add to the list of things that I am not so good at: waiting.

For polish to dry.

For chocolate cakes in the oven (My kids were wolfing this down after school today until my husband told them that it was filled with shredded zucchini. Smooth move Carl.)

At stoplights

In line 

On hold

For packages in the mail

For an answer

For the coffee pot

The next book in the series

For slow computers

For the dryer when something I need to wear is still wet

For upcoming vacations

Until I save enough money  

(might as well have the matching shoes too)

For word on when the fire will be out. The hills surrounding my community are litterally all on fire right now. The air quality is so bad that we were urged to remain indoors today. The kids had recess in the gym. Over 400 homes have been put on evacuation notice. I took this from my kitchen window last night.

Our house is  safe and out of danger. Maybe I should quit complaining?

cookies

Sometimes I just think the house should smell like cookies. Morgan's recipe is best recipe ever. You should go check out her exciting new project while you are there!

Enjoy!

 

I have an idea...

Grab some warm blankets,

and throw them into the back of the truck.

You wear these,

 

Source: modernhepburn.tumblr.com via Libby on Pinterest

Source: modernhepburn.tumblr.com via Libby on Pinterest

 

I'll wear this...

Source: northernstarcrossed.tumblr.com via Libby on Pinterest

 

Source: google.com via Libby on Pinterest

 

You should probably leave your razor at home.

Source: modernhepburn.tumblr.com via Libby on Pinterest

 

We can share this (it's coffee plus Bailey's).

Source: nowandthan.tumblr.com via Libby on Pinterest

 

I'll flip the pancakes,

 You fry the bacon.

Source: campingroadtrip.com via Jessie on Pinterest

 

Source: northernstarcrossed.tumblr.com via Libby on Pinterest

 

Let's ignore our schedules, turn off our phones...

Source: classy-in-the-city.tumblr.com via Libby on Pinterest

 

And throw away the map.

Let's get a little lost. Let's go camping.

Sunday Wedding

Gift. (The benefits of being married to a graphic designer!)

Finally got to wear my Betty Rubble beads!

Beautiful bride. 

Sweet couple.

Gorgeous evening. 

I love weddings. So thankful to be included in their day-- Congratulations John and Kristin!

Friday

What is it about Friday that makes you wanna skip the 5:30 alarm, sleep an hour longer, bail out on the treadmill, chat all day on the phone, indulge in chocolate, paint your toenails, read magazines, ditch the housework, and just head to the beach instead?

I did it all today. I guess it's a good thing that Friday only comes once a week!

Big and Small

Today:

I made oatmeal

French pressed my coffee

Said some sweet things to my girl Emma as she left for school

Spent 45 minutes at the gym pedaling a bike that didn't go anywhere

Changed light bulbs

Changed bedding

Made brownies

Made granola bites

Prepped for my childbirth class

Helped with math

Ran the dishwasher 3 times before dinner

Listened to Laurel read

Prepared salmon

Swooned over all the lovely words and images here

Hung towels out to dry

Swept the kitchen floor

And then...

 

I took the kids on a little evening walk. 

Sometimes life is about doing big things in big ways. Other times it is just a series of small, seemingly insignificant things done quietly.  I think we should celebrate big and small. There is beauty and meaning in both.  In fact, I think collectively, the small things are actually quite big.  

 

I think...

 ... that tomatoes make lovely windowsill decoration, and that I need to call my window washer guy. 

 

... that the early morning light is my favorite. I prefer sunrises to sunsets. Hope, promise, wonder, anticipation, newness, vigor; they all live there in that light. 

... that 18 years of ballet were hard on my feet.  I also need a new pair of running shoes. Bought the same pair in a different color online this morning. Is that boring? I never choose function over fashion. Does that mean I'm becoming a real runner? Or old?

... that golfing is one of the most excruciating tests of patience that I could ever possibly endure. I love the game, but I HATE being bad at it. Calling tomorrow to schedule my first of 6 lessons (my birthday gift). 

...that I'd like to read this book. Over and over again.

... that one of the best parts of being a parent is reliving the childhood moments that you were too young/naive/impatient/oblivious to appreciate as a young person. Like: ice cream at the pool on the last day of the season, surrounded by your siblings, on a perfectly sunny afternoon. Completely carefree. 

Source: etsy.com via Libby on Pinterest

...that someone should probably buy this for me. Size 6.5 with the letter "L" please.

 

 

...that is enough thinking for one day. Less over-thinking tomorrow.

hanging on

We spent some time up-valley this weekend.

It's always nice to get out into some wide open spaces.

There is a pear orchard right alongside Carl's aunt and uncle's property. The trees are all propped and heavy. Wouldn't that be a dreamy spot for a picnic or some afternoon reading? 

Also quite lovely was the wood pile. There's just something beautiful about neatly stacked things. 

I ducked inside the bean house while no one was looking and sampled. Tasty. The whole garden was in its prime. 

We played hard too. 

There is still some discrepancy about who "won" our game of pepper. I'm pretty sure it was me.

Ian was dunking it in the hoop.

Labor Day is a little bittersweet. I'm not ready to say goodbye to summer-- or white linen skirts, Popsicles, fresh tomatoes, afternoons at the pool, tan lines, and temperatures above 90.

Summer isn't officially over until September 22nd- which is 18 days away. I'm going to be hanging on...